THE GOOD AND BAD SIDES OF ANGER
We cannot wish away anger. It begins from the moment we are delivered as a baby out of our mother’s womb and let out that first cry of discomfort. Anger remains in us as a source of energized action that can mould and shape our lives. It can act as a motivating force to stand up for ourselves and overcome the challenges we face. Gandhi’s anger at the ill-treatment meted out to people of color in apartheid South Africa gave him the strength to lead our freedom movement. Many social revolutions, even today, are fuelled by a righteous sense of anger across the world.
Anger is a powerful feeling. It is a normal and healthy emotion that results from frustration, hurt or disappointment. Anger can help or hurt us, depending on how we handle it. It is certainly useful when we need to protect ourselves and motivate us to change our situations. The downside is that it can also make us violent and aggressive, making us behave in ways we should not.
Managing anger does not mean learning how not to get angry. It means learning to recognize the emotion, cope with it and express it in constructive ways. It is learning how to control anger.
WHAT IS ANGER MANAGEMENT?
Unchecked anger can ruin careers, family life, and drive an individual to complete shame and utter despair.
Dr. Murthy was the head of Research & Analytics at a Financial Services company, leading a young team of research analysts. With a PhD in Statistics, his academic credentials and subject knowledge were impeccable. But he had one big fault. He was always on a very short fuse and could never control his temper. Instead of guiding his team to deliver great work, his anger destroyed youthful enthusiasm and resulted in high employee turnover. After several warnings, he finally had to part ways with the company.
If you are someone who cannot seem to control your anger, it is in your best interests, and those around you, to take immediate steps to manage your temper.
Anger management offers you interventions to help you change the way you think, feel, and behave and keep your anger in check. It is important to develop and adhere to a well-constructed anger management plan.
MANAGING YOUR ANGER
Be Aware of your Anger Triggers
Identify the things that trigger your anger. It could be traffic jams, cranky kids, or just an exhausting day. Sometimes it can be an exasperating superior at work or a stubborn spouse. It is easy to blame your circumstances for your anger, but being conscious of your anger triggers can help you handle situations with a calmer frame of mind.
Analyze the Need for Anger
Take a quick moment to ask yourself if your anger is justified. If you are being mistreated at work or find yourself in an abusive relationship, you may need the anger to force a change in your circumstances. However, it may not always be a justifiable response to everyday situations. A lengthy queue or a delayed flight doesn’t warrant a raging fit.
Hold Back and Step Away
Keep an eye out for those warning signs of anger that you may physically experience: a hot flush, a tightening of your face, or an increase in your pulse rate. Take immediate action and prevent yourself from doing or saying things that can get you into an angry outburst. Taking some time-out can be the best way to help you calm yourself down.
Get Physical
No, not in a violent way, but channelize that mad rush of energy into a brisk walk or a sweaty workout that can burn off all that extra tension. It is a proven fact physical exercise helps release endorphins that reduce your perception of pain and triggers a positive feeling in the body.
Seek Professional Help
If you feel unable to manage your anger on your own, then you must take professional help. Your problem with anger can at times be the result of underlying mental health issues such as depression, or can even be the result of physical ailments that keep you irritable and trigger anger.
ANGER IS NEVER A SOLUTION
Anger is never a solution by itself. When you feel anger, it requires you to follow it up with positive action. Remaining angry will cause you further suffering. Merely holding back anger and not dealing with it can cause irreversible health issues such as hypertension and cardiac disorders. So, your well-being must deal with anger in any form immediately.