It is indeed rewarding and very fulfilling to have a loving relationship with your daughter. We wish to help our little girls grow into beautiful women with all the advice that we wished we were given right in time. The relationship of a mother and daughter is vital in teaching girls to be kind to themselves and to teach them to be strong and confident. As your little girl enters adolescence, it is crucial to teach her the value of self worth and inner beauty in a world that often forgets it.
We live in a society where girls are judged for their choices and dictated to be like someone else. They are always taught to shrink but you do not want your butterfly to live her life without understanding her inner strength. As a parent, it is your job to mark the line of difference between inner beauty and outer beauty to maintain a positive body image. Here are a few ways you can help tweens develop self-love and inner beauty.
1.Compliment differently
We have always associated compliments with looks but you must not make this mistake. It happens unconsciously but can have a huge impact on your little one. Do not compliment her on how pretty she looks or how beautiful she is, but for her kindness and the efforts she makes to help you. There are so many ways we can compliment women without making it all about looks. You can make her feel gorgeous because she has a kind heart and a loving soul but not because she looks like a model.
2.Talk to her
You can banish the beliefs from your child’s head by simply sitting with them and listening to them patiently. Being there for your tween can make so much of a difference to them. Ask her about what she thinks of beauty and what standards she has set for being beautiful. Once you understand her thought process and pattern of the answers, you will understand her better. If her definition of beauty is different from others, you need to get into a conversation and guide her to understand what really means to be beautiful.
If your tween seems withdrawn or shows any signs of depression, consider enlisting the help of a clinic that specializes in adolescent depression treatment. Teenage depression is common, and if you struggle to talk to your tween, you should provide her with the resources to express herself in other ways.
3.Discuss positive body image
You must let your tween know that she is beautiful just the way she is and that she need not compare herself with someone at school to feel good about herself. It will increase her self-worth as she will be able to understand the meaning of beautiful. Let them curate their own wardrobe and do not make any negative comments about what they choose to wear, as long as it is age-appropriate. Try to spend time with her by playing games and have a weekly session where you talk about women of the world who have gained recognition and success for more than their beauty.
4.Be an example
There are a lot of things that girls learn from their mothers. Your little girl is observing you and marks every move. Hence, they will learn to do what you do. So, be a good example for them. You must practice self-love before you preach. Do not talk about outer beauty in front of your daughter and make her realize that being beautiful is more about inner beauty. Be kind of yourself and practice self care so she will learn the same and never criticize yourself in front of her.
5.Have a healthy atmosphere in the house
You must have a healthy atmosphere where everyone discusses accomplishments and dreams instead of beauty. You need to provide a safe environment to your child where she will not be mocked for being the way she is. If there is a supportive environment, your tween will feel loved and appreciated and they will not look outside for love and validation.
6.Tell her you love her for who she is
Always praise your tween for her kindness and the work she does. Reward her for the ways she is being a good human. Reward her for being generous and being herself. Even if it is something very simple like helping with a chore at home or volunteering at a local charity, keep a count of it and appreciate the effort. Your child loves to hear how much you love them and it should be done through words and not deeds.
Always be there for your little girl and be attentive to what she says. Being a good listener can make a lot of difference. Never compare her to anybody and let her know that she is forever loved for the person she is. She is loved for her values and inner beauty and not by the color of the skin or her body size or color of the hair.
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